Old stuff...

I'm changing it up a bit this week...taking it way back and stepping up the random factor.  I'm talking 80's cars and washing machines.  Yes, this post has it all.  :) 





I get nostalgic a lot.  Being part of a military family, I have learned to move and bid goodbye to "stuff" leaving me with just memories.  Some of those memories make me laugh, even if I don't mind leaving behind the "thing."  And, today, I'm taking it back to my first car...

1988 Ford Tempo GLS (not sure what the GLS means). 

It was reddish-maroon, 2 doors, instead of a spoiler it had some sort of fin-type thing.  It had "new" electric seatbelts, power locks, manual windows, some sort of power lumbar support button, and a tape deck that came with a sweet tape of awesome 80s music.  It was a 5-speed.  My parents bought it when I was in 3rd grade.  Little did I know I would be driving this fine piece of machinery to high school.  EM-BARRASSING!  But doesn't everyone have one of THOSE cars?!? 

It never stranded me.   But I called it "the bomb" because I felt it could blow up at any time.  And, secretly, I hoped it would so maybe I could get a new set of wheels.  It did have an issue with some hose breaking and making what I thought was smoke spill from the hood, but that was a quick fix.  The heating coil broke one year in college and we had to wait for the part.  It would overheat if you didn't turn the heater on full blast.  I fully remember driving down I-81 in the middle of winter with the heat blasting and the windows down because it felt like a sauna in there.  The cruise control didn't work when the A/C was on.  Something broke in the steering wheel once and the horn would just start randomly blowing...and it was the loudest horn I ever heard.  Ahh, memories.

I took it everywhere until I bid it goodbye my junior year of college when I bought my first new car.  We sold The Bomb to my uncle (who used it to drive back and forth to work so as not to put miles on their newer cars) for $475.  Asking price was going to be $500, but it needed an oil change at the time, so we took that into consideration.  Yeah, when the value of your car goes down because it needs an oil change--awesome. 

My dad used to sing this song "Old Yellow Car" from as far back as I can remember.  And, after bidding goodbye to the Tempo, it has a little more meaning now.  If you haven't heard it, it's worth a listen.  Don't get me wrong, I don't wish I was driving The Bomb NOW, but it will always hold a special place in my heart.  And there's something to be said for a car that's paid off, never leaves you on the side of the road, and you could care less if a grocery cart runs into it in a parking lot.  :)



And while I'm on the topic of old, funny songs and old stuff, I figure I may as well share this song as well. This is one my cousin used to sing all the time...I would beg for it because it made me laugh, and still does! Plus, he "jazzed it up" just a bit with the sound effects, which you will hear in this little tune, making it even better. :) Now, it reminds me of MY washing machine. The first grown up purchase that Buzz and I made together was our washer-dryer set. We got it on sale for like $500 (yes, for the SET--great deal, huh?!?) right after we were married at the Navy Exchange in Newport, RI. That was nearly 9 years ago...and it's still running. But that old washing machine is a lot louder with a variety of noises than it was in its new days. Hopefully it has some time left with us...but it's seen better days. And, when it's time to go, I guarantee I will be humming this song in my head for days.

Enjoy! Hope this provides some smiles and laughs...and I would love to hear about others' relationships with their bo-bo cars and household appliances. :)

Party! (in my head)

I don't usually go for the newer songs on here, mostly because they haven't been around long enough to "speak" to me.  BUT, this week we have an exception, for a few general reasons.

1.  Any song that can fit "Zach Galifianakis" into the lyrics of a song gets a major awesome point from me.

2.  I have a huge conscience and, what those close to me call, a guilt complex.  I overthink EVERYTHING and that overthinking turns into excessive worry.  I replay things I have said or done in my head over and over and come up with countless ways that I should feel bad, made a fool out of myself, or made someone think less of me.  And when something even remotely "bad" does happen, it's stress city in my brain!  Some recent examples of my overthinking (not to mention I still stress out about events from years ago, as well):

- First, Let me not forget my pay it forward adventure and its aftermath. Seriously, even when I try SO HARD to do the right thing, the NICE and KIND thing all planned out but things don't go exactly the way I think they should, I end up overthinking and worrying and being totally awkward.  I mean, I am awkward, but you'd think by now I could just embrace that and run with it.  :)

- I spent an evening at a little party at a conference with my colleagues, my professors, some other sociologists I didn't know, and a few cocktails.  Everyone was having a good time, most way more than me in the cocktail department, but I don't get in social situations with these people very often.  So, for so long after that, I stressed over whether or not anything I said was stupid or if the stories I told were boring. (Luckily, after talking with some friends after the event, I was totally not the most awkward one there and other people did things silly enough to be remembered over any faux pas I may have made.  Yay!)

- I have made plans to go out to dinner and a movie with Buzz and another couple this weekend.  We NEVER do things like this.  K has even been asking if she could have a "young" babysitter come hang out with her like they used to do before she went to school.  BUT, I feel guilty because I am going out and leaving her at home--even though she will have way more fun that if she were to come with us.

- When we do go out to special events, like the Marine Corps Ball (seriously, that's the ONLY time we really go out), and someone else puts K to bed, I can't sleep when I get home because I feel guilty and feel like a bad mom for staying out later than her bedtime.  I seriously have issues--most of these probably stem from the fact that for so long, it was just the two of us--Buzz was deployed so much in her first few years and I was away from family and most of my friends.  I never had the option to do such things.  K and I are a team.  But SHE has cut the cord, I believe this is MY problem.  Mom guilt sucks...especially when you worry like I do!

Anyway, back to 2. on my list...These are just a few examples of how I feel and overthink everything and lose a lot of sleep over things that no one else probably even remembers, or people don't even remotely care about if they DO remember.  I dream of being able to let things go, of having fun without worrying that I said or did something stupid or to "silly," of not caring if I am an awkward faux pas queen.  I have always prided myself on being true to me--of who I am and what I stand for.  I wouldn't compromise that for anything, but I will stress about it!  :)  So, this song makes me smile big smiles--and laugh.  Because I can't IMAGINE being in such crazy situations and saying "Whatever." "It doesn't matter."  Oh well!"  It seriously makes me uncomfortable to watch people being awkward on tv or hear about an embarrassing story of someone else.  The scenarios in this song make me uncomfortable--but they make me laugh because of the anecdote to just be like "whatever!"  And I dream of letting myself off the hook--even for just one night--to let my crazy hair hang down and not look back with anything except for happy laughs.  It's not likely to ever happen, but in the soundtrack of my mind, it's a good hypothetical story. 

And, 3.  I like the beat.  :)

So, without further ado, here is MY song for the week...(and, yep, I'm bouncing and smiling right now)  :)

Head on over to

to link up and hear other great songs!

She's all mine!

I can't believe my little girl--my baby--is getting ready to turn 4. In some ways the time has flown yet I can't remember what life was like without her. She's my whole world. But back to her birthday...I have been shopping for gifts for weeks. I have a bit of a problem over-shopping for her. My wardrobe is outdated and I don't get new "gadgets" and such. But my daughter is dressed to impress and has more "stuff" than we know what to do with. It's an addiction.

I remember her first holiday--Easter. I was so new to motherhood and lost in a cloud of exhaustion and love. But when I realized I got to shop for this little part of me, well, the rest is history. That was my first shopping spree for someone other than myself. It was amazing--and it continues to be. I'm a frugal (cheap) shopper so I don't go over the top in cost, just over the top in stuff. Shopping for her has been therapeutic for me during all of the deployments in addition to the fun and escape it provides during "normal times." I think this is a disorder. :) But it's fun! I am able to get lost in her world--which is much better than the world out here that we all live in.

Anyway, I still feel like I am living a dream. My amazing little girl is growing up--which means her clothes and toys get bigger (and cost more even when you do shop cheap). Sometimes I question whether or not I am spoiling her. I don't think so--I hope not. She's got the biggest heart of anyone I know. I like to think I played a big part in that. So I will keep on shoppin'. Why? Because I want to. Because it's fun. Because she's all mine...since she's a part of me, I figure I can continue to sport last years' threads as long as she keeps lookin' fine. :)

Dance like nobody's watching

This weekend was the Marine Corps Ball (happy 234th). It was tons of fun. But something was missing--dancing...MY dancing. Lots of people were dancing, drunk dancing. That means that even if I would have found the guts to really get out there, people probably would not have remembered--and it's not like any of them would be a finalist in the next season of So You Think You Can Dance. (Is that show still on?)



I used to dance. When we went out and there was music, I was dancing. I was never "good" but I had fun and was uninhibited (probably by alcohol) and had a great time. Those days seem to be over. I still hear songs on the radio that I used to dance to back in the day and it makes me want to get out and dance--just let loose and have fun and not care about anything except the pursuit of having fun. But on those few occasions where I DO get the chance, I chicken out. BOO!



So I have been thinking about this the past few days. Why does it matter? What has happened in my life to turn from someone who would just get out there and "cut the rug" to standing on the sidelines remembering the good ol' days? I don't know--I still haven't figured it out.



But then, today, something clicked. K was dancing and singing to a variety of music (from DMB to Miley Cyrus)--I mean she was SINGING at the top of her lungs (getting most of the words right) and DANCING her little heart out. It was beautiful. I watched her and smiled. Then, I joined her. We have dance parties on a regular basis, but we do it in the comfort of our own home away from windows or with the blinds closed. It is SO much fun. (THESE are the moments I cherish...living life with my daughter and getting caught up in the moment. It is amazing.)



But watching her dance in the context of my weekend got me to thinking... She was dancing like no one was watching. But, the thing is, someone was watching and she didn't care. For a few minutes, I just sat there in awe wondering how we get from that place in our lives to the place where I am. How do we get from truly being able to just enjoy the moment in the moment with pure joy to being scared to do the Electric Slide in front of a bunch of drunk Marines? I don't know and I still haven't found an answer for that, either.



But here's what I do know... I want to bottle up whatever is inside of my daughter right now and keep it. I want to take some for myself, but mostly I want to have a reserve to make sure that she keeps that spirit--that uninhibited love of life in the moment. I hope that she never cares who is watching (or listening) as long as she is doing what she believes in her heart is the right thing. I hope I have the knowledge, strength, and health to raise her to believe in herself first and foremost, so she knows it doesn't matter who is watching. We can learn a lot from a child and I think it may be the adults who screw up this sense of spirit with our own insecurities. But I know she has it now and I am going to take her cue. Watch out for the next Marine Corps Ball, there's going to be a 30 year old Captain's wife on the dance floor and it may not be artistically amazing, but it doesn't matter if I feel it in my heart. :) Here's to dancing like nobody's watching in all spheres of life--even when they are!

Age Stratification--Highlights of a mildly wild almost-decade

I really feel old. Well, I don't FEEL old, but I feel like people look at me as ancient relative to them. Maybe it's being in the college atmosphere again at age 29; maybe it's the gray that has popped up in my hair since deployments became a part of my life; maybe it's that my friends and husband are all hitting the big 3-0 and it's around the corner for me.



Last night I saw a tv show and then today a professor was talking about living wild and crazy in your 20s. Does all the fun stop when you hit 30? I mean, if age IS just a number, then what's the deal with this? My definition of fun (as well as the practice of fun for me) has changed throughout the years. But I think maturity is GOOD thing, not a bad one. You can still grow on many levels and keep a sense of excitement, right? At first, after hearing all of these references to having fun in your 20s, I thought that maybe I had missed out on something. And then I started freaking out because I have less than a year to get the fun in. Then reality (or whatever my social construction of reality is) hit me in the face. I HAVE had a great time in my 20s--just like I did in my teens--and just like I hope I will in my 30s, 40s, 50s...and hopefully into really old age!



So I decided to take this opportunity to reflect on some of the highlights of MY 20s...starting at age 21 (21 and 5/6 to be more precise) because that is when Buzz reentered my life...and THAT is when I allowed myself the opportunity to redefine my life and take it in a positive direction. And that direction included LOTS of fun (with quite a bit of craziness--I did enter the USMC family at age 22).



Just to (probably over) qualify the list below, this by no means discounts the fun I had before my 20s--like the infamous "ice cream summer" I spent with my cousins, aunt, and grandma where we got ice cream every day as a kid, Sarah and my summers in high school with Shoney's weekends, beach week with my best friends... Nor is it to in any way discount or minimize that my 20s held absolutely the best, most important, magical time in my life that has made me who I am, was the best decision I have ever made, and filled my heart with a love that words cannot even begin to explain--becoming a mom. AND I want to reiterate that great moments didn't all have to include alcohol--like the "Cheers night" when Buzz and I went Walmarting and raced to put fans together for his mom, watched Cheers, and I realized he was the one in the simplicity of the moment; or the many Sonic, Exchange, Walmart, Food Lion, Commissary, Target, Coldstone, Old Navy trips I have taken with my girls; or the homecomings from deployment when, for a minute, time stood still in the arms of my husband and my daughter.



Qualifying over--here's the list:



Walking to the liquor store in multiple feet of snow with some friends AND Sampson because we drank all of the alcohol in our houses and needed more. (Best line of the night--our neighbor backed his car down our street where he had just passed us and said "I thought you were high schoolers!")



Screaming the SpongeBob SquarePants theme song at the top of our lungs in an old-ass car full of Marines and wives while bar-hopping.



The E-club in RI (too many random stories to recall here)



Buzz getting his microphone taken away during a botched attempt he and other Marines were making at a John Denver song on karaoke at a redneck bar in RI (yes, there are redneck bars in RI) by a butch lady.



At that same bar, having an older woman (lacking in some teeth, but I'm not judging) sexually assault one of our friends while telling him that she reminded her of her son.



Playing life-size chess (drunk) on a ship somewhere between FL and the Bahamas.



Drinking in the front yard with Brad and Erin (you would have to live in base housing at NAS Jax to fully appreciate the gravity of this one).



Doing the wave at the Deli to my dad's friends' band and spilling drinks--so many memories from that night.



Lots of commissioning parties.



Breaking bowling lanes in Jax (AKA the REAL Jacksonville).



Dressing up at the Mario Brothers for Halloween.



Gangsta New Years 09!



So they're not THAT exciting...no one got arrested or streaked or did anything TOO regretful (which is all what people apparently consider to make it a "good" story). And this is by no means an exhaustive list. But it was all SO much fun!!! And I have lots of good memories from my 20s and hope to make some more this last year of the awesome decade. But I hope that there is even more fun to be had as time goes on...I mean, it seems that with time, you can have all of that fun and even more with the knowledge from all of your previous successes and mistakes. The possibilities for what's to come seem amazing! Plus, isn't 30 the new 20?!? I'm just getting started!